tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41564311414382740202024-02-18T19:01:56.463-08:00Faith & Hope & LoveConjoined twins Faith and Hope sharing one heart.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comBlogger47125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-3803943846960207782012-09-07T16:38:00.002-07:002012-09-07T16:50:12.492-07:00My Memorial Speech<div style="text-align: center;">
This is the speech I read at the cemetery yesterday evening. Family and friends gathered around their grave in a circle to celebrate their birthday. Thank you everyone who came to celebrate. It was so comforting having you there supporting us through this hard time of grief. </div>
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Standing here before us was once the body of our beloved daughter Faith and Hope. The bible tells us God planted a garden and made our first parents from the dust of the earth. Ever since then humans have longed for the garden of paradise. His saving passion, Jesus was buried in a garden and rose from the dead on the third day. Forever making all graves and graveyards holy places. We should always show great respect for the dead because while they were living it was the temple of the holy spirit. So we come here today to decorate the grave, celebrate their birthday, and show them love and respect.</div>
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Let us pray...</div>
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O God you gave us Faith and Hope as our daughters/grand daughters/nieces and with your love and grace you have called each of them home. This day we celebrate, their birth into the world exactly one year ago today. God thank you for continuing to be our light and guiding us out of the darkness of grief. God please be with us all as we journey without these two beautiful baby girls. Now that Faith and Hope have gone with you, every single memory is precious and holy. Bless each memory we have of them, that they may always live in our hearts and minds. We know you Lord are taking great care of them. One year has passed and yet we feel near to them. Our hearts yearn for their touch. Though grief as softened, a duller pain is still there. Their bodies were bound together in my womb and their souls are forever too. O Lord thank you for allowing me to give them life. I have been truly blessed by their presence and amazed with what a miracle you created. I don't grieve for them but for myself, as I truly miss them. We shared so much, yet it was only 23 days. Help me Lord realize the distance is not so great and one day we will be reunited in heaven. You took them to a place of paradise, where there is no sorrow, crying, or pain just the fulfillment of peace and joy for eternity.</div>
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Amen.<br />
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<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fahr069-fzE" target="_blank">Somwhere Over the Rainbow</a></div>
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<br />Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-41050898099819770352012-09-05T14:36:00.000-07:002012-09-07T16:42:59.403-07:00Faith and Hope's Birthday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Today we celebrate Faith Rosemarie & Hope Lillian's Birthday!</span></div>
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They were born on September 6th 2011 exactly one year ago from today.</div>
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I can't begin to tell you how much I really miss them. </div>
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I can't believe that a whole year has gone by.</div>
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Video 1: </div>
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The night before I gave birth, I hated knowing I wasn't going to</div>
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have them in my womb anymore, protecting them.</div>
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I started to tear up at the end, very emotional day.</div>
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<b>.Leaning on God's shoulder.</b></div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dziLCsgX4TunP9QyFddDuBrkP2CJN41vfypvokXVFmH6Tld3QKRAihP8dMyHl34VPSqlTnDOr9wbPFc7HEy-w' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
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Video 2: </div>
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This video my sister took just seconds after Faith and Hope were born.</div>
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I treasure this video, along with many others. </div>
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The Nurses and staff were trying their hardest to</div>
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let me see my beautiful girls for the first time.</div>
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<b>.Beautiful Chaos.</b></div>
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<span style="text-align: start;"><b>God found great plesure of take a lowly thing in the world and show truth.</b></span></div>
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<b>Update:</b> I am doing good most days, but of course I still have my sad days. Lately it's been really overwhelming with all these different emotions leading up to their birth. Some times I can control myself and others I can't. Another reason my emotions are a little off is because my husband and I are expecting a little girl in December. Getting all of her things ready for her arrival, reminds me of when I was getting things ready for Faith and Hope's arrival. Some days I spend my day reading old emails of encouragement, while others I flip through photo albums. Not a day goes by that I don't think about them. I am so happy with the choice I made by giving them every chance at life to live. Those 23 days I treasure forever in my heart. Every day I watched them grow was a miracle to me, that kinda feeling you get when your child becomes the president or finds the cure to cancer. They truly were nothing less than an amazing gift from God. I forever remember all of the blessings and prayers that we received during and after my pregnancy. You are truly wonderful people. <b>Thank you all again for the love.</b></div>
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<br />Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-22787424816912889012012-05-21T19:07:00.002-07:002012-09-07T16:41:33.195-07:00God's Love<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; line-height: 14px; text-align: left;">I'm going to tell you something I hope you'll never have to know. I'll tell you how a heart can break and tears can constant flow. No I didn't break up with my boyfriend, I didn't lose my job, or my house. I lost my baby girls. Angels in my eyes. God chose to take their hand one day and led them into the skies. But please do not forget my daughters. They were a person too. Forever they will live inside of me and you. So, please don't ever tell me that time will heal my pain Because not even time can bring them back again. Just tell me their happy in heaven waiting for their mommy. That their snuggled in an angels wings all wrapped in God's love.</span></div>
Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-4664961771183567762012-03-01T07:10:00.001-08:002012-03-01T07:10:45.784-08:00Amelia Lee and Allison June<div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Recently it was brought to my attention of another couple carrying conjoined twins. Reading her story brought make many memories and tears. I'm hoping that these baby girls have a fighting chance at life. Their anatomy is different than Faith & Hope's. Their anatomy shows 2 hearts and are facing each other. The mothers story tells about how her own doctor recommend termination also, as they did when I was pregnant with Faith & Hope.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">"I went to my first high risk doctor three days later. He did an ultrasound and then met with my husband and my mother and I. He was everything but positive. He said he didn’t think they could be separated and that most likely they wouldn’t make it. He didn’t give us much hope. He encouraged us to terminate the pregnancy. We left there all in tears. I could feel the babies move and it killed me inside. I knew then I couldn’t give up on them"</span></div><div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">They are being delivered by c-section this morning March 1st 2012. They are at CHOPS in PA.</span> Please pray for this wonderful and faithful family. God does a remarkable job listening to our prayers. And when you pray, please pray for all babies that have left earth too soon; <span class="fbPhotoCaptionText">Ava and Teagan, </span>Skylar and Siri, Faith Lea and Hope Alyzbeth, Peyton and Sundae, Arianna and Isabella, Melody Joy and Madison Hope, Addy and Ally, Faith Rosemarie and Hope Lillian.</div><div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Thank you.</div><div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
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</div><div style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; text-align: center;">Exclusive Video:</div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/video/6792629-exclusive-expecting-mother-to-give-birth-to-conjoined-twins/#.T04VEDGfuY9.facebook" target="_blank">Birth to Conjoined Twins Amelia & Alison</a></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-60657799709419481842012-01-30T06:36:00.000-08:002012-02-02T15:33:25.851-08:00March For Life 2012<div style="text-align: center;"> If Faith and Hope were still alive I know they would want you to watch this video.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Every child deserves to live.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zl7FCwMxpLA" target="_blank">Click to watch March For Life 2012</a></span><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">FHL <3</span></b><br />
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I got a surprise email from one of my blog followers . I sent her Faith and Hope bracelets awhile back. She was attending this years March for Life. She was almost ready to leave her home but she quickly grabbed the bracelets and wore them proudly during the march. I just want to say THANK YOU for thinking about my sweet angels and for attending that cold/rainy parade. It means so much to me. I know if Faith and Hope were still alive they would have wanted to save babies lives. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Their story proves that all life has value and the right to be born and loved.<img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhC-5vWYRPKDUZ_Xnt8cWLGxXHNmYfYAQjrj_PmUAHjdEhXsOikHsbYQiKVj59HeFJU1UhMLAVQyS4FphB60oVzkLa8m4MTw6O6An4VesN743kpiBPST1-6RcFDw3AmF-ppQBf7iWS6lvVT/s320/431229_377122792303624_100000177184642_1724740_729293920_n.jpg" width="320" /></div><b><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></b></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-34869164762453326602012-01-04T06:35:00.000-08:002012-01-04T06:35:40.882-08:00Amazing Video<div style="text-align: justify;">This video is amazing! After watching it, I am more amazed by God. It is a beautiful and inspirational video. I don't know how anyone could deny God's power and will after watching this! It is pure amazement. The human body is simply amazing. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Something to marvel about. Two cells (sperm and egg) make you.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Yale scientist on the video talks about how complex the human fetus is. He says it's beyond human comprehension. "It's like magic"</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">If only we can only get more pregnant women to watch this video, I believe they would realize that abortion is nothing but murder. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">In video you can clearly see that a fetus is a human being from the moment of conception!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">How can our country and our world permit the massive destruction of human lives??</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://liveaction.org/blog/amazing-video-yale-scientist-visualizes-conception-to-birth/">Amazing Video Conception To Birth</a></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-14457932737094265102011-11-24T11:52:00.000-08:002011-11-26T05:23:54.849-08:00Thankfulness<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Be Thankful for what you have, because someone my never be given that chance. Whether it is be being able to have children, owning a car or house, having food on the table, or running water. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">In these past months I’ve been trying to stay positive, and move forward. Some days are harder than others, when knowing God took my daughters so soon. So, this thanksgiving, I need to remind myself that I am thankful for everything God has given me. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Lord, I'm struggling show me what I have to be thankful for:</div><ol><li>I can see</li>
<li>I can walk</li>
<li>I have shelter</li>
<li>I have never gone hungry</li>
<li>I have a family that loves me </li>
<li>I have great friends</li>
<li>I have a bed</li>
<li>I have a computer</li>
<li>I have clean running water</li>
<li>I can hear</li>
<li>I have a job</li>
<li>I have a cell phone</li>
<li>My health is good</li>
<li>I have a bathroom</li>
<li>I have 5 nieces and nephews</li>
<li> I have plenty of clothes</li>
<li>I can read</li>
<li>I own a car</li>
<li>I gave birth to twins </li>
<li>I am alive</li>
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<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="text-align: justify;"> Thank you God for giving me life; Amen.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwR0ZwZxh03wyPAqvOi1N7srT4AtdJQ-B42wcalX9iKdQ8IJipSgv2sudHo9olxA39Ji2GvMno9BBbUSSJxXbvrwDKKH7HECizGOOXosGHS-RkSDQwtTm-8fhtQgyxEuxjPs0T2XJY9lmU/s1600/197806608602962670_eqBvUUBB_c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwR0ZwZxh03wyPAqvOi1N7srT4AtdJQ-B42wcalX9iKdQ8IJipSgv2sudHo9olxA39Ji2GvMno9BBbUSSJxXbvrwDKKH7HECizGOOXosGHS-RkSDQwtTm-8fhtQgyxEuxjPs0T2XJY9lmU/s320/197806608602962670_eqBvUUBB_c.jpg" width="320" /></a></div></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;">"Thankfulness is the defense against materialism" </span></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-78740954680141078962011-11-21T08:22:00.000-08:002011-11-21T08:27:35.584-08:00Heaven's NurseryIn Heaven there must surely be<br />
A special place, a nursery<br />
Where 'little spirits' not fully grown<br />
Go to live in their Heavenly home.<br />
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The angels must attend with love<br />
Tiny spirits on wings of doves,<br />
The choir of angels must sing lullabies<br />
Maybe quieten their tiny cries.<br />
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The Father must come by each day<br />
To cuddle and play in a special way<br />
These tiny spirits left earth too soon<br />
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These sparks of life did not perish<br />
But came to the Father's love to cherish,<br />
To grow and be taught in His own arms<br />
Safely away from all earthly harm.<br />
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The comforter was sent to earth at once<br />
To the parents who lost their little one<br />
Their hearts so ache, their arms feel empty<br />
The question 'why' seems so tempting.<br />
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Then all at once in the midst of tears<br />
There comes a peace that stills the fears<br />
The parents share the Father's own need<br />
To hold their tiny spirit being.<br />
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They relinquish their own desperate hold<br />
And release their baby to the Father's fold,<br />
Then comes an angel to whisper the truth<br />
Of a nursery in Heaven bearing rich fruit<br />
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Of tiny spirits chosen to worship the Father<br />
A place that couldn't be filled by another,<br />
Called to be spared from the struggles of earth,<br />
Chosen to be one of Heaven's births.<br />
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So Father, whisper words of love from me<br />
To our baby in your nursery.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-33876231420011327842011-11-11T18:42:00.000-08:002011-11-11T18:42:00.148-08:00Flowers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">I found these beautiful flowers for Faith and Hope. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Pink for Faith and Purple for Hope. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6qELLl48Se80wrgk3A3riFc0Y9QhFpRnCa9al1miymLkK4r85VTsyJi3unvVspfW8gCJJRsolvuET-85SXByOuQPwjmHVRtqNms4wld7fBCgAJrBGZNRmEmzYxrFj_a1Q38GTlie2hBKd/s320/311459_10150384189388856_784888855_8260408_54045264_n.jpg" width="240" /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Visiting their place they lay to rest, is hard. It is hard because I always remember the last day I spent with them. I remember kissing them a million times. I remember not wanting to let them go. I love them more than anyone will ever know. A piece of me is gone. Going to there funeral was like I was attending my own. A part of me left. But a new part is growing. My faith. My faith is growing more and more. The more I go the more I feel connected to my angels. I love going to church. I get so emotional and it's so moving. I feel a good sense of their presence at church. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I love helping other families with conjoined twins. I ask for you to pray for these families who have lost there beloved conjoined twins. All these babies had the most beautiful and hopeful families. Families that are so strong. If you know anyone going through the pregnancy of conjoined twins or who has lost there babies, please email me at aschulten@ymail.com </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
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</div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-19338885853433590102011-11-08T09:55:00.000-08:002011-11-08T10:08:05.487-08:00Miracles<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Faith and Hope would have been 2 months old a couple days ago on November 6th. I miss them very much, they are my everything. I am constantly thinking about them. Everything I see or hear reminds me of them. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Faith and Hope, I love you with all my heart. I carry your heart in my heart, always. Love Mommy.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">The other day I was in Hobby Lobby (Christian Hobby Store) and I saw something that read “Happily Together Forever” and right next to it there was a card that said Faith Hope Love. I started crying right there in the store. I didn’t care who was watching or what they were thinking. I was having one of those moments of grief. I have learned that during my mourning process, if you feel like crying then do it. Sometimes, you just need to sob, scream, and drench tissues and pillows in tears. Let it all out. Don’t hold back those tears or emotions. Let yourself feel sad, happy, depressed, scared or whatever you are feeling. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">I’ve been trying to surround myself with positive things. I can’t let the negative people get into my life. I need to be strong and know in my heart that God is our savior. I have been doing a lot of praying and going to church more than I have ever gone in my life. And I feel closer to God. I feel like a have a deep relationship with him. I view life differently. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">I am a true witness to what life is really about. It isn’t about who has the most friends. Or who has the most money. It is not about becoming rich and famous. It’s about loving your family and most of all loving God. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">God has given us a beautiful life. And He has blessed me with two miracles. Two souls that I hold so deep in my heart. But I don’t regret giving them 23 days to live and 8 months to grow inside me. They were miracles and showed me what life is all about.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">Just look around today, a little bit harder than usual, and see if you can pick out Gods little miracles.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUhYB282NQ0_ii23n6zYaU4AbLNjnR1a0YBX6aIwCr5_hngWuiNbXMEMkwNEUw0PSvUHYaU9TZvdk7ozrZDeeLca20agkCJmS-mCOYb6poQoMsy3XZtWa6-lcWJbyINXuDYHTc8qz4bG_A/s1600/zdfadf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUhYB282NQ0_ii23n6zYaU4AbLNjnR1a0YBX6aIwCr5_hngWuiNbXMEMkwNEUw0PSvUHYaU9TZvdk7ozrZDeeLca20agkCJmS-mCOYb6poQoMsy3XZtWa6-lcWJbyINXuDYHTc8qz4bG_A/s320/zdfadf.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> </div></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-1203267237301533572011-10-27T14:47:00.000-07:002011-10-27T15:38:53.128-07:00Faith and Hope's Book<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Beth Speer, Author and Illustrator. </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"> Her most known book; Lula.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.amazon.ca/Lula-Beth-Speer/dp/145201549X">Available to purchase on amazon.com</a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo_yn0lqoLOw2NMg1uTdIdGkUb5k43WnyfcLsdXVQcfd5FXquRgKh6T5oT5zdtWWO4gYLPqELzBX3UmsO3qis3HNto3RO7IczT_GT9uuaF59v4Y4ZnZ-nONceHSS00Ezfne9ZSJAQ116Qe/s1600/61EyNr3qwfL._SS500_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo_yn0lqoLOw2NMg1uTdIdGkUb5k43WnyfcLsdXVQcfd5FXquRgKh6T5oT5zdtWWO4gYLPqELzBX3UmsO3qis3HNto3RO7IczT_GT9uuaF59v4Y4ZnZ-nONceHSS00Ezfne9ZSJAQ116Qe/s320/61EyNr3qwfL._SS500_.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">Beth has been busy making a new story. The story is about my little girls Faith and Hope. Beth having her own set of twin boys, was touched by my story. She was so creative! She tells the story of two little fish named Faith and Hope. The fish get left on my front step of my house. I had a choose to keep them or not to keep them. I made the choice to keep them and give them love even though they were different and weren't your average fish. These fish were special fish, who I loved the most. The story is well told, and great for children. It teaches them to love, even if they look different. Everyone is different and Beth nailed it! BIG THUMBS UP!! Beth sure has a special talent! Thank you so much Beth!!! If you would like to order. <a href="http://www.mixbook.com/photo-books/interests/amanda-5383194">Faith and Hope's Book</a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip9Yc6Lv3zQ6q-lokC6Y5WbXGELcR_BP7L3aNimLLVgGyBe1_wZNzI3eE6Y3HnpsfmTu4eWzQm_pcmQzRn6ZOd4vlvgQwObERlwfkPg_e5ST-ihZZLovTIcic-T8FyM3bspzgmvO5OH9cC/s1600/311935_10150380758193856_784888855_8236662_1034611873_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip9Yc6Lv3zQ6q-lokC6Y5WbXGELcR_BP7L3aNimLLVgGyBe1_wZNzI3eE6Y3HnpsfmTu4eWzQm_pcmQzRn6ZOd4vlvgQwObERlwfkPg_e5ST-ihZZLovTIcic-T8FyM3bspzgmvO5OH9cC/s1600/311935_10150380758193856_784888855_8236662_1034611873_n.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> Beth Speer</div><div style="text-align: center;">"This will keep Faith and Hope's story alive" </div><a href="http://www.mixbook.com/photo-books/interests/amanda-5383194"><br />
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</a>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-77335841338081879152011-10-18T20:35:00.000-07:002011-10-18T21:12:18.035-07:00Faith, Hope, Love Crosses<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3wzXciDsM4Yk-oY4gQ0UOtXlg01R2tdrdsmtxNIx0hWE3xiOlkPG89GtYcLeaXFP8f5beCdD_kmcESWMuLLmIvjn_93pDEPBDwJN3La6Ubtnr7PbkOobLdT0WuvdnT26XjIQaATVOCsVC/s1600/248050-438x.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3wzXciDsM4Yk-oY4gQ0UOtXlg01R2tdrdsmtxNIx0hWE3xiOlkPG89GtYcLeaXFP8f5beCdD_kmcESWMuLLmIvjn_93pDEPBDwJN3La6Ubtnr7PbkOobLdT0WuvdnT26XjIQaATVOCsVC/s320/248050-438x.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Talented, hard working, and a heart of gold! </div><div style="text-align: center;">Jim has been busy making these beautiful crosses for me!</div><div style="text-align: center;">Thanks to my close friend Karen.</div><div style="text-align: center;">She also is a twin, who has always been there for me.</div><div style="text-align: center;">FAITH & HOPE & LOVE</div><div style="text-align: center;">Aren't they so beautiful! I will treasure them forever!!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Please comment on his page..and let him know what an awesome job he did.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://lumberjocks.com/projects/54719">http://lumberjocks.com/projects/54719</a></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-28285679625468577132011-10-15T12:49:00.000-07:002011-10-15T12:50:14.813-07:00Chain of Light<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKQm56wGTvj9odcCrIAozmmkrFNbyiLEOW7XhGvck8RWnO2h-k_qQDowCdtfQvbI75NtqqOM9arPwkcgeRqH7crF5Mx5TfJdcNlsLVzpUmA3kr3KVVbDlyMNjpwNtaysQrc7LeEesjUPE2/s1600/318452_10150364829088856_784888855_8150019_947570947_a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKQm56wGTvj9odcCrIAozmmkrFNbyiLEOW7XhGvck8RWnO2h-k_qQDowCdtfQvbI75NtqqOM9arPwkcgeRqH7crF5Mx5TfJdcNlsLVzpUmA3kr3KVVbDlyMNjpwNtaysQrc7LeEesjUPE2/s320/318452_10150364829088856_784888855_8150019_947570947_a.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody translationEligibleUserMessage" data-ft="{"type":3}">As many of you might not know October 15th is a day where we all come together to remember babies who have gone to heaven. It is also a day for the International wave of light where people from the world over will light a candle at 7pm and leave burning for one hour. The result is a continuous chain of light spanning the globe for a 24 hour period in honor and remembrance of the children who die during pregnancy or shortly after birth. Please join us tonight in the chain of light.</span></span></h6><h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody translationEligibleUserMessage" data-ft="{"type":3}"></span></span></h6><h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}" style="font-weight: normal; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="messageBody translationEligibleUserMessage" data-ft="{"type":3}">I am a a mother of two beautiful angels in heaven. Today marks October 15th Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day. Please pray to all the sweet precious babies that have gone before us. Mommy and Daddy love you Faith and Hope. Our lives have been enriched by having shared your love.</span></span></h6>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-86609061099777471252011-10-11T12:57:00.000-07:002011-10-11T19:11:16.482-07:00May Angels Lead You In<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQLB9KjGWktDHCO2RuGWbddz9_0_cyMAWFlXos0PVmnqU1fNOIh8v-EeqlKUARu4PpH6CmqTUaYuFOmqCCsWl1E4SwQY8EsDV7S5UINRdmCaUzhjzheOPsI-12Zc9nVfHMGjjirob1ct3j/s1600/blackandwhite.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQLB9KjGWktDHCO2RuGWbddz9_0_cyMAWFlXos0PVmnqU1fNOIh8v-EeqlKUARu4PpH6CmqTUaYuFOmqCCsWl1E4SwQY8EsDV7S5UINRdmCaUzhjzheOPsI-12Zc9nVfHMGjjirob1ct3j/s320/blackandwhite.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div align="center" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div align="center" style="text-align: center;">Faith Rosemarie & Hope Lillian </div><div align="center" style="text-align: center;">September 6, 2011 - September 29, 2011<br />
<span class="commentBody" data-jsid="text"> "A life not measured in time but in love"</span> </div><div align="center" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<div style="text-align: justify;">I know that everything that has recently happened in my life is not a coincidence. I think it happened for a reason. The day prior to finding out I was carrying conjoined twins who share one heart, the discussion topic at my church group was abortion. Then, the next day, my doctor told us there is no chance that they will live and that I should get an abortion. Right then I was faced with the big question should I keep them? This proved to be a huge test of my faith to either go through with a heartless abortion or to choose life for my children. I willingly and knowing chose life for my daughters Faith and Hope.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div></div><div style="text-align: justify;">On September 28th Uncle Jimmy spent the day with girls and me. Daddy came soon after work from his long, two hour drive. We spent all day and night playing and laughing with our daughters. That night we invented the "tent." We made it to block the light in the room, so they would open their eyes without the light shining bright. They loved it! They were able to stare at us for hours and we would smile and think how beautiful they are. I loved when they would open their eyes. Faith and Hope were two beautiful girls. We took a lot of pictures that day more than any other. We said our nightly prayers and goodnights and when we left to go to sleep their favorite nurse Francine was there taking good care of them. She always called Faith "Sweet Pea" and Hope "Sugar Plum." I know she misses them dearly, and they have truly touched her heart. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">In the morning I heard knocking on my bedroom door. I looked at the clock and it was about 5:45 AM. I thought Petey was at the door, thinking he forgot something, but to my surprise it was Amy, a friend who also has a baby in the NICU. She said Petey called her because the hospital and Petey were unable to reach me, and that the hospital keeps trying to call the both of you. We had to get there right away, the girls aren't doing well. Luckily, the night before Petey (my fiancé) dropped off my car; otherwise we would have had to wait for a bus to pick us up. So we jumped in my car and sped over there. Of course when you’re in a hurry there's no where to park and everyone is trying to slow you down. The person at the front desk was giving us a hard time getting upstairs to the NICU. I called my sister Kristin in a panic, telling her to please pray with me and pray for Faith and Hope. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">After I hung up the phone, we went in the elevator to the 2nd floor NICU. We got buzzed in and then we reached the NICU front desk and said "BED 47" She said "GO." At that time my heart was racing and my legs felt like jello as I was racing to my pod. When I reached their bed, there were about 20 staff members all around my daughters, I looked up at the monitor and their heart rate was dropping to the 50's/40's. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">I flashed back to the day the doctor told me I was having conjoined twins sharing one heart, who weren’t going to live. I remember having the same exact feeling. I remember crying, feeling so sick, and helpless. I started to pray by signing the cross over my girl’s bodies and prayed that they will be safe on their journey to heaven. Soon everyone in the room joined in and we all wept together. They told me, “We tried everything Amanda.” I gazed around the room and everyone’s facial expressions told me this was it. So, I sat down right next to the crib, where they laid for 23 days together, and for the first time I held them without any tubes or wires. Their faces looked like pure angels they were so peaceful in my arms. I let both of them know how much I love them. I remember Faith’s eyes locked with mine and I kept telling her that “you are going to be with Jesus and mommy loves you so much.” The nurses comforted me while they were on their way to heaven. I felt their last heart beat as I held them in my arms. I was so thankful I had my friend Amy right there by my side. I smiled when I saw her, without her I might not have been able to be there for their last minutes on earth.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">About 10 minutes after they passed, my dad showed up at the bedside. We comforted each other with many hugs, kisses and tears. We brought the girls upstairs to the 4<sup>th</sup> floor to a large room. One by one the room was filled with family and friends. Everyone was able to hold and embrace Faith and Hope for their first time. Everyone was crying because we missed them, but we all knew where they were, in heaven. That is the place everyone in this world is trying to get to. Faith and Hope are there waiting for us with arms wide open, joined in heaven with many other loved ones. What comforts me the most, is knowing that they have each other, always and forever.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Petey and I are now glad that before giving them a bath we made 3D images of the girl’s feet and hands. After that we put on their beautiful white gown that Sandy, my neighbor, sewed together for us. I couldn’t get over how beautiful they looked. Our photographer Ana came and took a lot of pictures for us. She is so wonderful, she volunteers at the company “Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep.” We spent about 8 hours together and then we had to say our goodbyes. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">We went to the Ronald McDonald House, which took great care of us during our stay. It took two cars to fit all of my things and gifts. When I got home I felt so out of place, I haven’t been there since August when it was nice outside. Later that evening we went to visit my co-workers at Hair Cuttery; we stopped by on our way to the funeral home. My parents, Petey and I met at Countryside Funeral Home. They took such great care of us and we made all the arrangements for Sunday and Monday. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">On September 30, I spent my day with my nephew Tristan. Tristan turned 3 years old we celebrated life, while yesterday we honored death. Later on we went to the cemetery. On the drive I thought why at 21 years old do I have to find a spot to bury my children? I did nothing but love them with all of my heart. I thought about all the mothers and fathers who neglect and abuse their children. Then I thought how lucky my girls were to never hear yelling or fighting. Every day all they ever saw and heard was love. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">As I walked around the cemetery trying to find the perfect spot to lay them to rest, I asked the women to show us open lots for sale. I walked to the top of the hill right at the “T” in the road, one row back. I asked her if this spot was available. The background is a beautiful open field where the sunsets, and looking to the right is where our church will sit. I felt comfort being there. The peaceful environment, made me feel visiting them will be a beautiful place to meditate, pray and share stories.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">October 1<sup>st</sup> the day before the wake my family came over to help make food and fill the photo albums. I developed over 1,000 pictures of the girls and we filled 4 books full of pictures to share with my close friends and family. My sister Kristin and I were busy putting them in chronological order, good thing every day I put a different headband on them to make it easier to know what day it was. The girls had over 30 headbands because I loved to dress them up. The girls only wore 3 outfits their whole life so the headbands were a blessing! Sharing the photos and telling the stories about the pictures was a great way to remember Faith and Hope. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">The day was going well until, my computer wanted to not corporate with me. I was busy making a slideshow filled with videos, music, and pictures of the girls. The songs I picked were: Arms of an Angel: Sarah McLachlan, I will Carry You: Selah, Borrowed Angels: Kristin Chenoweth, You’ll Be In My Heart: Phil Collins, Somewhere Over The Rainbow: Israel Kamakawiwo’ole, and Ave Maria: Beyonce. At about 2 AM I finally fell asleep with no slideshow fully made and woke up at 5AM to try again to get the slideshow to work and burn to a DVD. Finally, with the help of Petey (my fiancé) we were able to finish the DVD in time, before we left for the funeral home. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">October 2<sup>nd</sup> was a very busy morning trying to put the slideshow together and blowing up 46 balloons. Petey and I were the first to visit Faith and Hope as they rested in peace. When we opened the doors in the funeral home, we saw a little white casket in the front of the room. The room had a sharp fragrance of roses and lily’s. The room was filled with huge arrangements of flowers (Rose’s and Lilly’s for their names Faith Rosemarie and Hope Lillian). I remember holding Petey’s hand tight and knowing that we have each other to lean on. We knelt before them and began to pray. I remember in that moment praying for strength to get through this day. The girls looked beautiful but different from the days before, no tubes or wires. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Right then I flashed back to September 29<sup>th</sup>. I missed their air leaks, squeaking with every breath they took because I knew that they were breathing. I missed their pretty eyes when I would read Dr. Seuss and sing them sweet lullabies. I missed Hope’s mouth filled with bubbles and Faith’s sweet smile. I missed them sucking their purple pacifiers and gazing into my eyes. I missed holding them and rocking them to sleep in my arms. I missed the nights I sat by their bed just to watch their chest move up and down or watching them hiccup. I missed them holding onto my fingers when I reached for them. What I missed the most, was when I would talk to them they would know mommy was right there. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">As the day went on more family and friends came to express their condolences. A friend of mine told me September 29<sup>th</sup> the day Faith and Hope were called to heaven was Saints Day of <span class="labelcolumntitle">Michael, Gabriel and Raphael. </span><span class="labelcolumntext">Each of these archangels performs a different mission in Scripture: Michael protects; Gabriel announces; Raphael guides</span><span class="labelcolumntitle">. </span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Anyone who has children knows that in that moment after you deliver you want to share your child’s picture with everyone. You love them so much you want to tell everyone. This was the first time for many to see the girls, as I never got the chance to share pictures because of the media. As each person passed by the girls, I shared stories and sweet memories of Faith and Hope. I wanted to make sure each person knew that we love them more than anything else in this world! I think many people would agree. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">October 3<sup>rd</sup> 9:30AM we met at the funeral home to say our last goodbyes to Faith and Hope. I read them a poem I wrote. It was hard to read through the blurred eyes of tears but I was glad I was able to read it to them. The day was harder than yesterday. I didn’t want to leave their side but I knew they weren’t here spiritually. I knew that Jesus had them wrapped in his arms, taking great care of them. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">We arrived at our home parish St. Charles Borrmeo. Our opening song was “Amzing Grace” the song really broke me down and touched my heart. The mass was beautiful and peaceful. After receiving the Eucharist; during meditation, they played and sung a beautiful version of Ava Maria. I had the goose bumps the whole time. I kept thinking I know they are in heaven singing in the highest. Our angels Faith and Hope are in the happiest place, most joyful, most heavenly place they could possibly be. The closing song was “How Great Thou Art” one of my personal favorite hymns.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsbWlTYSD4MVdtdw23-FY_aStbPAcfICQg6g8IG0e8CLST_wGImfEMdTFe9M97fei2lPJ4FzcqY0njYU9hS55humZHZ35nzWLU7_FcvJHRLVtr4KLAtp3Gg57dJQRYfT8MAi3UfSy9iVqG/s1600/balloonswatermark.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsbWlTYSD4MVdtdw23-FY_aStbPAcfICQg6g8IG0e8CLST_wGImfEMdTFe9M97fei2lPJ4FzcqY0njYU9hS55humZHZ35nzWLU7_FcvJHRLVtr4KLAtp3Gg57dJQRYfT8MAi3UfSy9iVqG/s320/balloonswatermark.jpg" width="320" /></a>When we arrived at the cemetery, we spoke many prayers. Beautiful words were spoken by Deacon John. It was so comforting looking around and seeing a lot of people there supporting us. Petey and I laid a bed of rose petals. As the casket was lowered, we covered the top with more red rose petals and tears. We hugged each other for some moments and I remember thinking this is real. They are really gone to heaven. Many balloons, were released in memory of Faith and Hope. 23 pink Faith balloons and 23 purple Hope balloons, symbolizing the 23 precious days they were here with us. The beautiful blue sky was filled with 46 pink and purple balloons it was a moment I will forever remember. I will always cherish the time God gave us and I’m so very thankful I am your mommy!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Looking back in time I would have never thought I would be where I am now. I can’t really explain it but I feel like God blessed me with Faith and Hope to draw me closer to Him. I’m not the same person I was before I got pregnant. My life is forever changed but not in a bad way at all. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Faith and Hope will never be forgotten. They will forever live in our hearts. The story is not over, Faith and Hope will touch many more lives as the story is retold. Faith and Hope didn’t live to be the longest living conjoined twins, but they worked miracles and showed us love. Without love from their father and I the story wouldn’t have been told. I love you so much, until we meet again at the heavenly gates to the kingdom of eternal life. A place where there will be no more pain or suffering. We may not ever fully know why this happened. But in life know that we all must die and there is a heaven for all the good souls.<br />
<br />
I love you. <br />
<br />
</div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-63056916639869183332011-09-27T07:53:00.000-07:002011-10-19T08:38:01.507-07:0021 Days!!<div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;">Sorry, I’ve been so busy being a new mommy, I have no time to update this blog. Faith and Hope are 3 weeks old today! Wow, I never thought I would be able to say that. And I feels great to say they have made it this far! They are true miracles. Faith and Hope have a few rough moments but nothing to alarming. They continue to grow and get stronger each day. They are weighing about 10 lbs. now. Overall they are doing well and every day is a new adventure for us to treasure. We are so happy to experience joy and happiness with them. :) I gave them cute nicknames. Faith is Smiles and Hope is Bubbles. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;">We continue to have hope and savor each moment with our daughters. </span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;"> </span></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;">We would love for you to continue to pray for Faith’s and Hope’s precious life. Each day is amazing. We love being parents and seeing all of our prayers answered.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;"> </span></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;"> Faith and Hope wore their first outfit this week which was a 3 month old dress! They look so adorable in clothing! We had to adjust to make it work but it looked nice for our weekend visitors. Thanks to my wonderful nurse Pam for helping me find clothes for them! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; line-height: 115%;">Our next goal is to prepare for us to go home. Updates are tough, because every hour is spent at the NICU, but we will try to keep them coming. Petey and I would like to thank all the great nurses and doctors at the NICU. We have grown so close to many of you. You many never know how much you all have encouraged us. Thank you. Most of all we have been encouraged by the numerous of people praying for us. E-mails, donations, gifts, and visits. We can’t begin to express the gratitude that we have for all of you! I am so lucky to have been given this life that I have and it is built on my faith in God. I love you Faith and Hope!!</span></span></div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-63667905419742286492011-09-20T20:28:00.000-07:002011-09-20T20:28:11.014-07:002 Weeks OldWhat if I would have listened to the doctors? What if I would have terminated the pregnancy? What if I would have listened to what everyone else was telling me? What if I didn't listen to my heart? I would have never spent 2 weeks, 14 days, 336 Hours, 20,160 minutes with my daughters. I would have never seen their beautiful blue eyes, hold them in my arms, or kiss them goodnight. I'm so happy and proud I didn't make the mistake of having an abortion. So many people have abortions and don't think twice about it. Being their mom I look past all the abnormalities and see true beauties. God makes no mistakes. I'm so grateful to have God in my life. It has taken a lot strength to be where I am now. If I could turn time around, I am happy to say I made the right decision. I can't stress enough of how happy I am to spend these past two weeks, right next to my babies. I love watching them grow. Yesterday they were weighed at 9 lbs. 15 oz. They are such a special gift! Today I cried tears of JOY while I was holding them in my arms. I looked down and they both reached for my hand and right then I knew they are worth fighting for. They didn't utter a word, but I knew they meant I love you mom and thanks for believing in us. I love them with all of my heart and soul!! I love knowing how loved my girls are to many people I barely know. Thank you all for strengthening all of us and sending us positive emails.<br />
<br />
Please continue to pray for Faith and Hope. <br />
<span style="font-style: italic;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.</span><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold;">Philippians 2:9-11</span>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-61099772178504365732011-09-16T18:00:00.000-07:002011-10-19T08:37:42.819-07:0010 days!It has been 10 days since I gave birth to my precious babies Faith and Hope. Time is really going by so fast. Faith is eating now. The girls are getting a lot bigger. From what I can remember I think they gained almost a whole pound already. Way to go girls! My nurses here are so wonderful. I love them all. One of my nurses gave the girls nicknames, sweet pea and sugar plum. So cute of names. So I decided to give them nicknames also. Hope is Bubbles and Faith is Smiles. If you could see them you would name them that too. It's so cute when I suction their mouthes Hope has a million bubbles. She can really make them big too! It's so cute. Faith is always smiling and awake for me. She's always looking around at the world and stare at me with her big blue eyes! I wonder what she's thinking. Babies are so adorable with everything they do. Don't you just love babies? They are so peaceful when they are sleeping. Faith and Hope were holding hands while sleeping. Of course I took a picture. It was the most beautiful picture I have ever taken. I love my girls so much!!<br />
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<br />
Also, thank you all for the positive emails I have been receiving. I appreciate you guys taking time out of your day to write to me. I love hearing your stories and connecting with people. Thank you for showing your support and praying for my family. Again, thank you so much. You all have up lifted my spirits! :)Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-21640880697653254132011-09-15T08:54:00.000-07:002011-10-19T08:36:22.798-07:00Be Grateful<div style="text-align: justify;">Just want to let everyone know they are not alone in whatever it is they are dealing with in their life. No one has this life easy. Some people have it harder than others. We need to pick ourselves up and make things better. Let's all try to be better people. No need for being negative and mean. Live every day like it is your last. Life is absolutely a huge blessing. Be thankful we are all here on earth. You don't learn what life is all about if you always have it easy. The hard tests we are put through makes us stronger and appericate every day more and more. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Who do we always turn to when times get hard? God. Do we ever reach out when times are good? We need hard times so show us to appreciate things. Days are always filled with there ups and downs. We need to make sure we enjoy those good days and forget the bad. You have to move forward to the better. Appreciate life because you never know when it's your last day here on earth.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I know my daughters are thankful for every day that they are here. I hope everyone celebrates today living their life. Life is good. Please hug your children a little tighter, call your parents just to say I love you, and be friendly to a complete stranger. Because you never know who's having a bad day and you might be the one to brighten it. :)</div><br />
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Faith and Hope are 9 days old today and are doing great! I love you!!! xoxoxoxAmandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-27313976008134198672011-09-14T20:39:00.001-07:002011-09-14T20:52:32.465-07:00Faith & Hope & Love Someone emailed me this beautiful quote. Thought I'd share it with you.<br />
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Faith makes things possible, Hope makes things work, Love makes things beautiful. Always have Faith, Hope, & Love <3 you have them all.<br />
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Faith and Hope are 8 days old today!!! :) <br />
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</span></h6>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-27914407609269987912011-09-13T17:34:00.000-07:002011-09-14T20:40:33.018-07:00September 13thAt times I think it's strange when people email me saying I'm a good mom and example. I don't know any other way. Some even emailed saying more women should be like me. I don't really understand why? Are all moms not loving? How can parents not love their children? Honestly who can hate a beautiful child? Hmmm...something I have been thinking about...Is there really people out there that have no heart? <br />
<br />
About my day...<br />
<br />
The loud noises of the NICU drive me nuts. Every beep I hear scares me. Every flashing light bothers me. But I know they are in very good hands. These nurses and doctors that look over my daughters are amazing!! I just want to pick them up when I see them starting to cry. I want to be the one to rock them to sleep at night. I wish I could let them sleep on my chest and feel their little heart beating. I love watching their chest move with every beat of their shared heart. Last night when I close my eyes I think about how beautiful God made them. So pure and at peace. I also, think about all the other babies I see walking past. The ones I see with no family by them. The ones with no mommy or daddy. I can't go by those babies because it's against the law but I do pray for them. But they are wonderful parents here. I met some great and strong parents here. I feel so connected to them even though we just met. I can tell all of them love their children so much and would do anything for them. They always ask how faith and hope are doing. I love that strangers even ask how my babies are. Talking with other moms helps me feel not so alone here. All day I sit and stare at the monitor waiting to hold my daughters tightly in mommas arms. I love them so much!!!<br />
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The hospital has a scrap booking club for the families tomorrow. They supply everything for you and they develop pictures for you. I thought that was so sweet of the hospital to organize that. I have a big meeting tomorrow with a lot of doctors. We need to all put our heads together and form a plan. Hopefully we will discuss when we can take the girls home with us. Something I thought I'd like to share, before I leave for the night I hold each of their hands in mine and we say a pray. It's such a silly thing I do but I feel like it's working. Every thing I pray about with them comes true. I love my days with them.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-20955253037769818492011-09-13T07:11:00.001-07:002011-09-14T20:30:58.673-07:00One Week OldToday marks one week at 9:24<br />
<br />
Looking back on these 7 days has taught me a lot.<br />
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Never give up trying. <br />
<br />
Don't stop fighting for what you believe.<br />
<br />
Every day is a precious gift.<br />
<br />
Keep praying and He will listen.<br />
<br />
No one ever thought I would say "the girls are one week old today"<br />
<br />
Faith and Hope are doing great!!!<br />
<br />
They are breathing room air at only 35 weeks old!<br />
<br />
I'm so proud of them. <br />
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I'm so blessed I can sit by their side all day and night/<br />
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Can't wait for the day I can bring them home.<br />
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I love holding their little hands.<br />
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So I need to keep having faith and hope and love them to pieces!!<br />
<br />
I love you sweeties!!Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-6518727558136732202011-09-12T05:01:00.000-07:002011-09-12T05:02:29.857-07:00What It Means to be Loved A beautiful song written by an amazing song writer and singer Mark Schultz<br />
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Please take a minute to listen to the words of this amazing song.<br />
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I can relate in so many ways.<br />
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It was awesome listening to it because I feel the same way!<br />
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<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrXmHaBP-A4&feature=player_embedded">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrXmHaBP-A4&feature=player_embedded</a><br />
<br />
<br />
Lyrics:<br />
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<span class="line line-s" id="line_1">For five months and eight days my wife and I had waited</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_2">Gettin' ready for our baby girl</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_3">But when he called the doctor said I need to see you</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_4"> </span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_4">and could you come in soon</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_5">then something died inside of me to sit with him and hear</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_6">the tests that said our baby may not live to be a year</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_7">then turnin' to my wife and he said </span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_7">"whata you wanna do?"</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_8">and she said...</span> <br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_9">I wanna give her the world</span></b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_9"></span><span class="line line-s" id="line_10">I wanna hold her hand</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_11"> </span></b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_11">I wanna be her mom for as long as I can</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_12"> </span></b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_12">and I wanna live every moment until that day comes</span> </b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_13">I wanna show her what it means to be loved</span></b> <br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_14">so we spent each day, watchin' every minute</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_15">and prayin' for our baby girl</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_16"> </span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_16">and I will not forget the way I felt that moment</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_17">when she came into this world</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_18">but they took her from the room just as soon as she was born</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_19">and watchin' through a window I could see her holdin' on</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_20"> </span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_20">when a voice inside me said...</span> <br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_22">I wanna give her the world</span></b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_23">I wanna be her dad</span></b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_24">I wanna hold her close for as long as I can</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_25"> </span></b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_25">and I wanna live every moment until that day comes</span></b><br />
<b><span class="line line-s" id="line_26">I wanna show her what it means to be loved</span></b> <br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_27">Well ever since the day we've got to bring her home</span><span class="line line-s" id="line_29"></span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_29">she's been out to prove the doctors wrong</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_30">oh and you should see her now</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_31">she's as pretty as her mom</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_32">and theres a boy at the front door waiting just to take her to her high school prom...</span> <br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_33">and he wants to give her the world</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_34">wants to hold her hand</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_35"> </span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_35">and someday she may get a wedding band</span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_36">but she's gunna live every moment until that day comes</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_37"> </span><br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_37">and we're gunna show her what it means to be loved</span> <br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_38">Oh yeah (what it means to be loved)</span> <br />
<span class="line line-s" id="line_39">show her what it means to be loved</span> <span class="line line-s" id="line_40">what it means to be loved</span><br />
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</div>Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-37616139700607833602011-09-11T05:33:00.000-07:002011-09-14T20:08:15.791-07:00September 10thSeptember 10th 2011 is a day I will never forget.<br />
Every mother waits and dreams of holding their child for the first time.<br />
My turn has come and I held for the first time my little girls.<br />
I can't even describe how good I felt holding them.<br />
I cried tears of joy, while my fiance video taped the whole move.<br />
I was very nervous because the girls have a lot of cords and wires.<br />
But the team of 5 nurses got the job done! <br />
The girls were so comfortable in my arms.<br />
<br />
Also, early in the morning we had a priest come to visit.<br />
Faith & Hope were baptized. <br />
The girls have the best Godparents in the world.<br />
My brother-in-law and sister.<br />
Two of the most beautiful and amazing people.<br />
It was beautiful!<br />
They had a beautiful white gown that we laid over their bodies.<br />
So pure in God's eyes. <br />
Mommy & Daddy are so proud!!!<br />
<br />
Doctors are learning day by day new things about the girls.<br />
It's a learning experience for me and for everyone.Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-38673698428005476842011-09-10T11:18:00.000-07:002011-09-14T20:05:09.609-07:00BraceletsLots of people asking how they can purchase a bracelet.<br />
<br />
As of right now we have a lot of orders...so...<br />
<br />
Therefore we need to put on hold on any new orders as of September 14th.<br />
<br />
Thank you for understanding.<br />
<br />
God Bless & Thank YouAmandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4156431141438274020.post-34780236720328178862011-09-09T01:09:00.000-07:002011-09-14T20:10:28.839-07:00God is goodFaith Rosemarie and Hope Lillian were born September 6th 2011.<br />
Weighing a total of 8 lbs. 10 oz.<br />
Born crying and kicking.<br />
The girls lenghth was 15 1/2 inches.<br />
Mommy and Daddy are so proud of them. <br />
Time they were born is 9:24 am.<br />
We celebrate each day at 9:24 their beautiful life they share together.<br />
The girls have lots of soft brown hair and the prettiest eyes.<br />
God is good and he knows what he is doing.<br />
I'm so honored to call them my children. <br />
<br />
<br />
September 6th was a day miracles happened.:)<br />
I gave birth to the 2 most beautiful conjoined twins.<br />
I love everything about them!! <br />
The doctors and nurses were amazing.<br />
My c-section was a miracle and could possibly have natural child birth in future pregnancies. <br />
Thanks everyone who's praying for my little precious gifts from God.<br />
I sit with them all day waiting patiently to soon one day get to hold them in my arms.<br />
I cry tears of joy, that God made them so perfect. (at least in my eyes and anyone who has met them) <br />
I can't express enough how much I adore and love them!! <br />
We aren't sharing pictures.<br />
But we would love to show off these true beauties that God created.<br />
Again thank you for the support and I love you all. :)Amandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18348357957936750533noreply@blogger.com